Grief writing - Entry 6
Kindness is moving my body regularly and eating healthy food.
Kindness is wanting to go out in nature on the weekends and then actually getting out into the woods for a walk on Sunday afternoon. Kindness is committing to the things that make me feel alive. Getting into the cold ocean for at least 10 minutes every single day. Allowing that cold water to reduce my inflammation, lift my mood, and better my nightly sleep. Kindness in grief is not only pursuing self care, but pursuing the comforts in life that make and keep me happy, cozy, and safe. Kindness in grief is buying those shoes, and exchanging that hoodie for the one I like better, and asking for slippers for my birthday in July. Kindness to self is not caring what everyone else thinks, but putting what I need first, even when that's confusing and unorthodox to those on the outside. Kindness is seeing clearly the truth in the strained relationships and still doing what I want. Doing what protects my feelings.
Kindness is taking and participating in this writing course.
I do a lot to be kind to myself. I have more to do.
Kindness would be stopping feeling guilty for trusting my midwives.
Kindness is giving myself more grace for my choices wanting a natural homebirth.
Kindness would be accepting that I was doing my best while laboring at home.
Kindness is forgiving myself for not knowing any better as a first time mom.
Kindness would be stopping myself from stressing about being 40 and struggling with infertility.
Kindness is a mantra that helps. Kindness is knowing I did nothing wrong.